this new chapter, this is heaven!

why do u wait me for so long?
why dont u did that along?
why do we meet and stay?
then u acted like a mate, like a bestfriend.
then u said that u love me, when i love somebody else.

but it ended, and..

we're so close today.
I'll choose one. and you would.
we're gaining speed.
till i can't breath. and i like it.

and..
this is heaven when u close to me.
this is heaven when u care to me.
i enjoy.

i like you anyway, i like you to close to me, i even like you're late watch, you're weakness.

the chapter is heaven to me :)

halo Totally Painless!

so long, move along

u put me down to ground.
then fly me up to sky.
then u fly me, u make me down.
its really alright. i adore you, and really do.
but every body has the way to choose one.
and i dont think u can do.
i adore u, i like ur phone calls, i like to keep in touch with you. and i will make it true.
but i can only choose one.
and it won't be you.
i adore you, and really do.
but u can only choose one.
and it won't be me.
we're so close but too far. we have to stop when too deep.
i'll move along. move along.

the game is over

you say that you are my toy but not joy to me.
you say that i am such a big liar.
you say that you love me.
if love is just a game to me.
i made u as my versus.
then the next stage wouldnt be yours.
we're just game over.
all over.
if love is just a toy to me as like u say.
i made u as my boy.
then u wouldnt be there again to play.
the toy has broke and we're get over.
we are done. done to me. done to you.
love is fairplay even we dont even know what fairplay love is like.

too far to stop

gaze at the star alone.
nobody there.
and u never care for me.
alone in the deep cold and rain.
hope somebody here.
exceedingly wet and cold stay here.
then u never care

these words all i want to say

i wanna love you and i try to.
i wanna love you but i dont know if i can.
i wanna love you and i still try to.
but i dont know if i can.

aga aneh saya sedih

sore hari sabtu. rumah saya sepi seperti biasa, saya memutuskan untuk diam d kamar. tiduran atau apalah, yang penting pusing saya hilang dari kebiasaan hectic 5 hari sekolah.
suara kendaraan dan pintu pagar yg terbuka, saya sadar kaka perempuan saya datang. ya, baru sekitar satu bulan yg lalu dia pindah rumah bersama suaminya ke daerah yg agak jauh dr rumah saya. walaupun masih wilayah bandung. mungkin sekitar sebulan itu juga saya tidak melihat dia sekedar nonton tv dan santai bareng d ruang tv.
saya lgsg keluar kamar, menghampirinya di kamar nya dulu. saya tau dia tidak akan lama d rumah. saya lihat dia mengemas sisa baju yg ia tinggalkan d rumah. ia menengok k arah saya, seharusnya saya biasa saja. toh dia ga pergi jauh, saya bisa menemui dia tiap hari dan tinggal minta jemput kalau saya mau nginep d rumahnya. tpi knapa mata saya aga pedih melihat dia mengemas brg nya. 'sini sayang' katanya setelah melihat saya ada d pintu, saya cuma duduk di ujung tempat tdur nya saat kaka saya hampir selesai mengemas baju nya. 'mau kemana lg teh?' tanya saya padanya. 'pulang lg de, ke rumah. msh byk kerjaan.' katanya.
ya memang seharusnya dia pulang lg k rumah barunya kan?
tapi saya ga bisa menahan sedih. ya, memang selama saya bersama dia, mungkin kali ini saya menikmati berada satu ruangan dengan nya. kami sama2 merebah d tempat tidurnya, ia memberikan beberapa pesan sama saya. tidak seperti biasanya, ketika kita sama2 merebah dtempat tidurnya. saya selalu berhasil membuat dia marah, karena hal hal kecil seperti bungkus chiki yg saya taruh dimana saja, atau apalah.
saya sedih sekali ketika dia memeluk saya. mencium kening saya. lalu pulang k rumah barunya. entah kenapa saya sedih sekali. saya kembali sadar, ketika dia ada seperti biasanya. berkeliaran d rumah. maka saya menganggap dia biasa saja, kaka saya yg suka ngajak berantem. tapi ketika dia hilang dari keseharian saya, saya sedih sekali.